May 21, 2004 - Updated January
9, 2010
(Watertown, MA)
The Mole" Baker may come up short in the Philly Tourney as he apparently has no balls.
Beer Pong Practice - Take 2
In another attempted Beer Pong practice match-up, Mr. Baker agreed to host a pong session Friday afternoon to warm-up further for the Philly Beer Pong Tourney. Baker's abode in Watertown, as described in a previous beer pong press release, is suitable to outdoor pong. Baker invited dark horse, Wildman Bill to bat the ball around in a friendly game to practice focusing on arc sinks for the upcoming tournament.
Beer Pong Preparation and Paddle
When Wildman Bill arrived at the Baker abode, he eyed an usual and potentially
powerful Pong paddle. in the shape of a triangle, a bread board which Mr. Mole's
x-wife Lisa had coveted, seemed to be an ideal pong paddle. The triangle was
a slice of an oak tree including the bark and inner tree rings sanded and glazed
with a protective polyurethane coat. As Wildman Bill was gearing up to use this
new weapon, "The Mole" Baker grabbed his paddle and 2 cans of Natural
light. The only thing missing was a pong ball.
Mr. Mole was not prepared as a beer pong ball should be a fixture of every household. Unfortunately, after searching high and low, behind refrigerators and couches, not a single ball could be found. The result was rather sobering. Is "The Mole" Baker physically and mentally ready for the Philly
Beer Pong championships? No pong ball in the home leaves one to believe that Baker is not serious about winning the tourney.
Mole lamented over the fact that the last time pong balls were prominent in his house was over a year ago for his brother's bachelor party in which a game of beirut commenced. (Beer pong was unwelcome by Chris Baker and his younger friends, so the elder Betas agreed to partake in a game of Beirut in which they easily whipped the younger Baker opponents. Thank You Sarge "The Dragon" for your help with unbelievable throwback performance to silence the young-ins in Beirut.) How could this be - - opportunity for Beer Pong Practice, but no pong balls present?
Baker Beer Pong Ball Conclusion
In the end, unfortunately, Mole's X-wife and sister arrived to take Mr. Mole
away for dinner without a nice appetizer of Beer Pong. The lesson of this story,
ladies and gentlemen is that Pong Balls should be a fixture of professional Beer
Pong player's lifestyle. You should have a paddle, cup and balls at all times
to tackle any insinuating Beer Pong Challenges.
Only the experts will know if this lack of Beer Pong Balls will handicap Baker's (and Wildman's) performance. Stay tuned for the Philly Beer Pong results to find out.
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